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Guys, I got a huge promotion at work today! If you know how pathetic work my work history is, you’ll know what a huge deal this is. How did I celebrate? By doing laundry, listening to Lykke Li and drinking this delicious beverage, of course! Did you expect anything different from me? #everydayimhustlin

Guys, no joke, I was eating some arroz con leche and listening to music just now. I was doing my happy food dance, and then I tried to dance like Bey did in the Drunk in Love video. I did it in front of the mirror and was so fascinated by how awful my moves were that I kept doing it and doing it…until I flipping hurt my back. I’m on my bed in the fetal position trying to figure out how I’m going to get up and go to the bathroom. #sendhelp #iregretnothing

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